Dear Democratic National Committee:
You people are simply astounding.
President Obama and his administration has passed historic legislation, you control both Houses and the Executive Branch, your congresspeople are racing against idiots…
…and you are UNDERDOGS?
I can’t understand how a party like you can be completely in power and powerless at the same time. I am continually amazed at how awesomely bad you democrats are at forming messages.
At first I was amazed. Then I was stupefied. I sat through the painful interview of DNC Chairman Tim Caine on the Daily Show. In Caine’s Democrat fashion, he is oh-so-happy to share the new tagline for the Democrats for InDecision 2010: Don’t Give Them the Keys Back.
You see, it really sucks for me because I actually like you guys. It pains me to see you all have the reigns of power, do quite well wielding the power, and then you have no clue how to tell the American people about it.
DNC, the phrase “Don’t Give Them the Keys Back” is way too cerebral for the American people. The Republicans win the people over in two ways: dumbing it down so morons understand, or scaring the daylights out of them.
It’s cute to see that the DNC believes in the intellect of the American populace, but if you want to stay in power, you got to face the facts.
The people that will decide the election are not the brainiacs you target. The centrist and scare doctors will win the people. Pure and simple.
I wish it wasn’t the case either. See my previous post about changing the voting system in America.
Look, please don’t mess this up. The republicans have done anything and everything to see the Obama Administration fail, and nothing has worked for them. The Democrats have killer ammunition to go after these GOP fogies, and all you have to do is use it!
Here is a very short, 5-step way the Democrats can take back the lead in all the polls:
1. Create a Top 10 things we’ve done for the American People list.
2. Make sure the list is written at an eighth-grade level (because remember, the American populace isn’t as bright as you think)
3. Share the list with all the democrats running for office.
4. Make sure they all stay on point. And don’t elaborate on the points.
5. Anyone who deviates should be replaced by someone who won’t
Ta-da. Basically it’s being a republican disguised as a Democrat.
But you’ll win.